The oldest male child in the 1860 household was 8 yrs old. He would not have served. On the 1865 Alabama Census, there should be a column on the far right listing the number of household members killed or died of disease in the war. Did Jemima list a number there?
I could not find a "better match" or "closer residence to Greenviile" in the 1860 census for a John W. Bowles than your John W. Boles in Coffee County, Elba PO.