Could not remember if I had posted this before or not.

Chuck Lee

Letter found in the attic of the Bates-Handford House in Batesville, Arkansas. The writer was Will Kerr,
possibly a great, great, etc. Uncle
St. Louis, Mo. October 24th 1865
My Dear Father:
Mr. Black informs me that you desire a full account of my adventures while a soldier. I am sorry that I
cannot accommodate you so fur as to give you a complete history, as I lost the journal kept as the events
transpired, and will have to trust to a memory somewhat treacherous. I can perhaps give you a general
outline, correct in all things except dates. I threw myself into the Confederate ranks on the 21 st day of July
1862. I was actuated to do so by the purest motives. I am candid when I say that the Virginia blood which
flows in my veins had a great deal to do with my conduct. I remained unsettled in my opinion on the great
question which agitated the country until the "Old Dominion", after having tried in vain to reconcile the
difficulty by compromise, hoisted the disunion Flag and declared that she would govern her own institutions
in her own manner. Then and not until then did I become convinced that war was inevitable. Of course my
course was plain indeed there was but one course for me, being every inch of me a Southern man. The
delicacy of my health prevented me from proving my faith by my works until the time already mentioned. It
was then that Col. Porter a somewhat noted Rebel Officer penetrated into the northern counties of Missouri
followed by a small nucleus of men around which he expected to form a Brigade and take it to Arkansas
where the Trans-Miss army was being organized. The oppression of FederaI misrule had so exasperated the
people that they were ready to catch at the smallest straw which promised any prospect of relief, the
consequence was, that Porter's numbers increased in one day from 250 to 1200 men. With this force he
attempted to make a circuit through the upper counties and then cross the Missouri River and make his way
South. He was doomed to a disheartening disappointment. His men were a raw undisciplined set without the
first idea of the duties of a soldier to add to their inefficiency that they had hurried into the ranks under the
impulse of intense excitement without once thinking of the hardships they would have to undergo, and as
soon as they began to feel what it was to ride day and night skirmishing with the enemy oftener than eating
their dinner, their military ardor was soon cooled down, and murmuring and complaining commenced. They
wanted to go home but they had gotten their foot in it, and couldn't very easily get it out. To go home was
only another name for going to prison or the gallows. So far as I was concerned, I had taken a more calm and
deliberate view of the matter and was prepared to meet the worst let it be what it might. I was late starting,
but when I did go it was with the firm determination of stemming it through to the last if Heaven spared me.
T'was a sore trial to quit a comfortable home and kind friends to live a wandering [ch.....p] life exposed to the
worst the elements could do. And I presume I appreciated my altered situation and regretted the necessity
which brought it upon me as much as anyone. At first the novelty of the scene afforded me sufficient
amusement to keep off the ennui, but soon the novelty was drowned in something more serious and I was left
to find what pleasure I could in a very severe and protracted attack of blues. But I must speak more of what I
did than what I thought. I left home between two days, a fashion which I noticed was quite popular with
rebels in those days. Indeed it was very dangerous to adopt any other plan, as the country was full of
traitorous spies who could in a very few hours call together a force of Federals sufficient to thwart our plans.
There were about 30 of us met together in a very thick patch of brush to make our arrangements for meeting
Porter. As our scouts whom we had sent to ascertain his whereabouts did not return during the night, it was
necessary that we should remain where we were until the next night. It would have amused anyone to have
stood off and looked in at our actions during that to me the longest day that had been since the time the sun
stood still. It seemed that we couldn't get close enough to the ground to be comfortable, the deepest hollow I
could find seemed to be elevated above all the surrounding country and more exposed to view than any other
place. We were permitted to pass the day without interruption however, and night brought with it our
scouts, who gave us the information that Col Porter was encamped that night about ten miles from us with
500 men. We waited until after midnight for the arrival of some more men who had promised to meet us and
upon their arrival we started, and reached camp about daylight. Col P. had had several engagements with the
enemy under Col. McNeil and although he fought against fearful odds had been tolerably successful, and
compelled them to re-enforce in order to do anything with them. McNeil's forces had been augmented by Col
Smart's Regiment and he was in hot pursuit of us. Col P. on the day of our arrival found himself at the head
of such a large ungovernable force that he could not risk a fight, so about noon he gave the order to march
north. We were then in Munroe County. And the long cavalcade of armed citizens moved off. We only
marched about fifteen miles and camped and spent the evening and night organizing into companies and
getting into better fighting shape. Twas then I was first sworn into the Confederate service, the most eventful
day of my life. At some time during the night an alarm was raised that the enemy was advancing and were
even then about upon us. In a moment the most intense excitement prevailed, every man was trying to find
his horse and saddle and I never heard anyone propose to load his gun, that did not suggest itself as at all
necessary. Presently a gun was fired, and then the excitement exceeded description, no one doubted for a
moment but that the engagement had commenced, and no one doubted but that it was necessary to save
himself it he could. The great first law of nature was fully exemplified on this occasion. The darkness
rendered this Babel scene doubly perplexing and at the same time so interfered with the getting away spirit
which seemed to prevail to so great extent, that the scouts got in and reported all quiet, and no danger, in time
to prevent the stampede that was about to take place. In a short time all was quiet again and we slept
soundly until morning. We continued our march north through Marion Co. had a small brush at Newark and
accomplished wonders or what looked to us to be a wonder. We captured the town, a pretty good supply of
clothing, arms, ammunition and about 50-60 Federals. You may rest assured we were proud. We imagined
that with out assistance we could end the war very soon. Our bright anticipations were doomed to a sudden
and disastrous termination. When we reached Kirksville in Adair County, the enemy were right at our heels
and the [Chariton] River was very much swollen by recent rains in our front and a fight was inevitable. A
very important advantage was to be gained if we could only succeed in routing them. We would be enabled to
cross the river turn our course in a Southwest direction and reach the Missouri and get over before the
Federals could collect their energies sufficiently to interfere. Co! Porter selected the town as the best spot
upon which to fight. As circumstances proved, it was an unwise selection. Our men could fight but poorly at
best, and the only way to make them efficient was to put them in the woods behind trees. Col. P. however,
had too much confidence in them as the sequel will show. It was about 10 o'clock AM when the preparations
were completed and our men under their several leaders were disposed in and behind houses and fences, with
beating hearts anxiously awaiting the onset of the foe. Presently his long black lines were seen reaching far
across the Prairie and slowly approaching the town. The suspense and breathless silence were truly torturing.
Long before they were within the range of our double barreled shot guns and squirrel rifles, they opened fire
upon us with their long range rifles and one or two small cannons. The idea of being fired upon, and seeing
men fall dead and wounded, without being able to return the fire was very demoralizing to our men and had a
serious effect upon the issue of the fight. It caused hundreds of them to hunt more safe retreats in the rear. If
they could have been situated in the brush where the enemy could not have seen them until they arrived
within a short distance and but indifferently then they would doubtless have fought much harder. The enemy
kept steadily advancing meeting but little resistance until they came up pretty close our double barreled guns
then opened upon them pretty effectively and warned them that it would be somewhat dangerous to
approach any closer. The contest was hotly contested for some hours. The enemy finally succeeded in
getting possession of part of the town, which threw them upon our flank. Our men then began to give way
slowly at first but increasing in velocity as they fell back until they suddenly became panic stricken and such
a rout!! In ten minutes the woods in the rear of the town was filled with terror-smitten men, running like
madmen in every direction, hunting their horses and had it not been for the coolness of our Commander and a
few men who held the enemy in check we would all have been taken in. Finally we all got on our way and but
one idea prevailed--and that was getting away from there. Four or five miles from Kirksville we came to the
[Chariton] river which was barely fordable, but in the excitement it was no barrier in our "[ Anuard] from
Kirksville". Fortunately I think no one was drowned. The Federals pursued us no further down the river. We
turned down on the West side and marched hurriedly in the attempt to cross the Hannibal and St. Joseph RR
and rush through before the enemy could throw himself in our front, but in this we were mistaken, for on the
third day after the Kirksville fight and when we were near the RR we were met by a force equal in numbers to
our own. I was not in this fight, having been sent back in the direction of Kirksville to ascertain if the enemy
was still pursuing us from that direction. The result of the engagement was that both parties gave way and it
was very certain that we could not force our way through to the Missouri River for the reason that the
enemy having undisputed possession of the Railroads could reinforce to any extend in a few hours. It was
also certain that we could not maintain ourselves as a body in that country. In view of these facts, our
program was immediately changed. Our first object was to throw the [Chariton River] between us and the
enemy so as to gain a little time and then disband into squads and seek safety in concealment. We
immediately about faced and marched for the nearest ford. And by pretty skillful strategy, marching and
counter marching so as to mislead the Federals as to our real intention, only were we able to reach it in time to
cross before they came upon us. So closely were we pursued that the command had not been over more than
half an hour before the enemy came to the opposite shore. Two of our companies had been left in ambush
upon the eastern bank in order to give them a check. The company to which I belonged was one. Of course, I
was there. We were stationed close along the bank of the river and finely concealed in the bushes, our right
resting where the road came out of the river. The stream was narrow and the road ran diagonally across it.
Our left was about opposite where it went down into the water. We had scarcely gotten our position when
the Feds came up and without waiting to reconnoiter their advance, pushed into the river. We waited
breathlessly until the stream was full of horsemen and then fired a heavy volley in their midst, the farthest
shot not exceeding 60 yards and the nearest not over 5 feet. It is my firm opinion that not over three men
escaped out of the number in the river. I saw two ride up the opposite bank and one got out on our side
which we captured. They were fishing there for Yankees about a week and the last I heard from them they
had succeeded in catching 80. One thing I noticed. We were pursued no farther. That night we hid our
wagons and separated into small bodies, each one to take care of himself as best he could, with the
understanding that we were to meet again whenever called upon. This occurred about the last of July or 1st of
August. From that time until the middle of October I spent my life extensively in the woods, never
presuming to stick my head outside while the sun was above the horizon. It was to me a most disagreeable
life. I would not for worlds, endure again the torturing suspense and sleepless anxiety I then suffered. Many
amusing little incidents occurred during this time and many that were not so amusing. It would take more time
than I can devote to this narrative to enumerate them. I will give you one or two specimens. Upon one
occasion another "Bushwhacker" and myself had gone to the house of a well known Rebel for the purpose of
ascertaining what was going on in the outer world. We had not been in the house more than ten minutes when
we saw two men riding very leisurely across the Prairie. Our fears were not excited and the thought of danger
never crossed our minds. We kept on talking for some time and when we next looked out the two gentlemen
we had seen were almost at the gate and a closer view disclosed to view the fact that they were in blue coats
and to add to our suddenly acquired consternation about three or four hundred yards behind them marched a
whole column of Federals, appearing to our magnified imaginations to number about 50,000 strong. Our
situation was truly critical and it was very apparent that something must be done. Our time for consultation
was very short so we acted on the first impulse which was to walk boldly out at the front door-there was no
back door - as though we were altogether unconcerned. Fortunately for us the cornfield came almost to the
house and we walked along the side of the house in full view of and about fifty yards from our blue-tailed
friends, until we got to the corner and then in about two jumps into the corn. And such running and crackling
of cornstalks!!! We ran at locomotive speed for about 150 yards and found ourselves in about a thick a patch
of hazel brush as ever grew here. We laid down on the ground and tried our best to lie down in it. The place
we were in was a narrow neck of woods extending into the prairie and we knew they could and had no doubt
they would scour the neck and find us. To make the case more alarming we had hitched our horses just where
we could not get to them without being discovered, so our only chance of escape was to lie still where we
were. We had not lain long when we heard a tremendous crackling of bushes above us and a noise as of forty
horses coming right toward us. Each looked at the other and the elongated countenances of each told the other
that in our opinion the war, so far as we were concerned, was about at an end, and we didn't look as though
we were much inclined to congratulate each other on its early termination. On, on, came the imagined
horsemen. Longer and longer stretched our terror smitten faces, wider and wider opened our terror smitten
eyes, closer and closer we hugged the ground, expecting each moment to be the last. Suddenly we were
greeted by the familiar B-a-a-a-a of three or four calves that were making a forced march from the Prairie to
avoid an attack of Greenhead flies. They seemed as much surprised to meet us as we were to meet them, but
not half so glad. For to tell you the truth I never was so glad to see a calf in all my life and to this day I feel a
very deep interest in all juvenile cows and listen with pleasure when they bawl. I conclude through the
presence of mind of the gentleman with whom we had been stopping, the Federals did not pursue us and we
were permitted to go on our way, rejoicing, more than ever satisfied that the safest place for a Reb was in the
woods.... Mr. Black's sudden arrival stops this narrative short. I will, however, continue to write during the
winter until I give you my full history.
Affectionately Your Son
Will W. Kerr