HEADQUARTERS, Mil. Div. of the Miss. Chattanooga, Tenn.

Nov. 18th, 1863

Dear Brother Nic:

Yours of the 30th Sept. was this evening received. I thank you very much for it, and I am more grateful to you inasmuch as I believe it is the first letter I have received from you since my entrance into the Army. By the heading of my letter you will perceive that I have not only changed my place in the Army, but my location in the geography of this heathen and God forsaken country. I am now Asst. Adjt. Genl. on Genl. Grant's Staff, who commands the Military Division of the Mississippi, a district comprising nearly ½ of the United States, and having within its limits ½, if not more of the Armies or troops of the Federal Union.

The flower and bulk of the Southern Army is here within speaking distance in our front. A few miles from here, was fought a short time ago, the battle between Rosecrans & Bragg. Before this letter reaches you, another battle will be fought between Grant and Bragg. To my mind the issue or result is not doubtful. Unless Bragg wins, he will be one of the worst whipped men in the south. And upon the other hand, should he get any advantage of us, we will be in a bad plight.

Now Nic, you in the North, who are out of the reach of the noise, excitements and hardships incident to an Army life, cannot begin to realize what war is. As I have said, here lies two great armies within sight of each other. Their whole study and object is to destroy one another. They watch each other with an eagle eye. Daily we hear the rattle of musketry as the scouting parties meet each other. Ands no hour of the day passes that the heavy boom of the cannon is not heard, and the screaming of the shell as it flies through the air, and its final thundering explosion as it bursts, scattering its death missiles in every direction.

Now this is a common and every day matter and no more attention is paid to it by any body that the popping of a frozen tree in mid winter in the north. You think that my fears have been excited from what I have seen and experienced. You never was more mistaken in your life. I would go into a regular battle as calmly as I would go to my meal when hungry, but I do not like to be shot at by unseen foes from behind trees, stumps and logs, as I was on the Mississippi, and with no chance to pay the enemy back. And again, a prudent man, engaged in the business I am now, knows full well that when he goes into battle, he may be going to his doom of death, and if he has an earthly matter to settle, to do so before he goes into such imminent danger.

Now Nic, you may imagine that because I did this, I was becoming frightened. I ordered, when expecting to go to Little Rock, Arkansas, that should I fall in battle, that all the property I owned in the north, should be equally divided between Carrie, Father and you. This Nic, will be my will in case I am killed during the war. Now in doing this, I do not evince fear, but prudence. I fear no rebel bullet, shot or shell in a fair fight and to tell you my honest conviction, I do not believe I am to be killed in the war. I propose by- and-by to come home and settle down once more on my farm, and go to work as all honest men do. Instead of thinking of me as a dead man, I want you to lay up in your mind the conviction that I am coming home again to gladden by my presence the heart of such relations and friends as think well of me.

My official experience in the Army as an Adjt. is checkered, or as some would say, singular. When I received my appt., the Sec'y. of War ordered me to appoint to Genl. John E. Smith; he was delighted to receive me, and made it very pleasant for me. I was getting along swimmingly when orders came for me to report to Maj. Genl. Grant, and he put me upon duty to his Staff. When we reached here, the General's staff had but little to do. I had but little to do, and a Genl. Wm. F. Smith came and wanted to borrow me, and Genl. Grant consulted to lend me. Genl. Wm. F. Smith commands the Engineer Dept. of the Army, and knowing me to be an engineer, he would have me. Now he wants me to leave Grant and stay with him, but I shall not do it, though I shall do the work of the Engineer Troops so long as Genl. Grant wants me. So you see I am making myself useful rendering my services desirable to the best generals in the Army. I am very much flattered and pleased by the kind attentions of all Army men with whom I have been brought in contact officially. As for the common soldier, he does his duty and pays respect to my shoulder straps.

Now respecting home matters, I am glad to know what you have done, and that everything is properly attended to. I want the family, that is, father and Carrie, duly and liberally cared for. They should not want for anything. The farm is large enough to yield a good living, and it should do so. When I left for the Army, I left no money at home, because I had none to leave. I had to borrow $500.00 to fit myself and get to my post. This I must pay from my salary as a soldier, and until it is paid, they at home can expect no help from me, and even not then, for a mortgage which is against me of another $500.00 must be provided for, and other debts amounting to $400.00 more. So you see by my statement that I am really a poor man.

For over six weeks I have been a sick man. In that time, I have lost 30 pounds in weight. I am now gaining, but very slowly. Our feed is, beef, bread and coffee, three times a day. Sleep, almost anywhere. Write me again when your time permits. Watch the papers for news from here. A great commotion is about to take place again among these hills. My regards to the Mrs. & children and to Mr. & Mrs. Wright.

From your alive Brother,
Ely S. Parker