I hadn't spent any time on this until yesterday, but some of it is beginning to make sense.
Her name was Virginia Adeline ?....? I'm not sure of the last name although I've come across one link that suggests it was Hoyl. It's an unusual story in that her first husband was a rebel of some sort (where?) and according to tradition had been hung at home by Yankees when caught visiting. The information I have was passed by her son (my great-grandfather) to my grandmother. My great grandfather claimed his mother was from Virginia and she had a daughter by the first husband. So if her last name was Hoyl in the 1864 marriage it was probably her first husband's name rather than her maiden name.
Virgnia Adeline ...... was born in 1843 and originally married in 1860. (Most of the oldest family records were lost in a house fire during the Great Depression.)
I have no idea what the circumstances were surrounding the execution, but since Virginia then married a Union soldier while the war was still underway, she must not have applied her grudge to yankees in general. Being that Jake Hoover and his family had come from Pennsylvania (his grandfather) and Ohio (his father), I doubt they were particularly southern in sentiment or manner.
I'm not certain if this Jake was in Missouri before the war or not. It is possible that it might have been his uncle, born in 1810 and married to a Huldah Hammet. (I came across an 1870 census record that seems to match his age and placing him somewhere in Missouri.) Our Jake moved his family to Kansas some time after the war, and returned back to Missouri for a time as a result of bad weather, but eventually moved back to Kansas to stay.
The Ohio enlistment sounds as reasonable as Missouri. I'll check the 40th in the O.R. and see where they were in '64.
I'm actually doing this to try to identify the Confederate side of the tree.