"You are dead wrong in your blanket statement that yankee soldiers were sent home to take care of their families. A great many of them stayed to occupy the South and enforce a harsh marshal law for vengeful yankees hell bent on plunder and revenge against helpless civilians, black and white."
The US government sent the soldiers in rebellion home to takecare their families. Grant even told Lee, let them take their horses, they will need them to plow.
In August 1862, over sixty Germans from Comfort, Texas attempted to flee to Mexico, after the hangings and cintinuous threats and acts of terrorism against them. They were chased down by a Confederate troops, which killed nineteen of the Germans at the Battle of Nueces, and executed fifteen others that were captured.
In the areas of Texas where these men and the hanging victims came from, the counties voted up to 70% against secession, same in parts of Tennessee and Virginia (now West Virgina) and elsewhere.. funny thing is, I do not see any CSA editorials or politicians or military saying "depart wayward sisters and go in peace", to those areas and citizens of the CSA who did not choose to leave the Union.