Some men claimed to be veterans, as you suggested. These are usually easy to detect.

A researcher has to decide which evidence is really important. The widow cited names of her husband's colonel and captain correctly - highly unusual in itself. It's like an x/y coordinate that puts Graves in a specific company at a specific time when Curry and not Pickett commanded the consolidated regiment. It's far more important than a unit number, which she (and her husband) may have never known (most of Roddey's men seem to have been uncertain about this). Plus you provided the assembly point for survivors of Col Patterson's command, Danville AL.

A majority of enlisted men and even some officers serving with Roddey's command will have no official record whatsoever. Paroles for Rddey's men at Danville and Pond Spring are not available. Since paroles and nearly all rolls are missing, the only records on file are 1865 paroles from other sites, prisoner-of-war records, receipts for clothing an arms issued while with the Army of Tennessee and a limited number of hospital entries. It's no surprise that a Confederate service record for Graves isn't available.

The few survivors of the 1st and 12th Alabama Cavalry regiments received paroles in North Carolina. The remainder came home without paroles. Some of them from North Alabama might have gone to Huntsville, Decatur or Talladega to receive paroles. Orders for assembly of Roddey's men (not other commands) at Pond Spring and Danville were one-time events, as there was no Federal military post at either place. That's a positive indicator that Graves served in Roddey's command.

At the end of 1864 Roddey's command included Johnson's 4th Alabama Cavalry, Patterson's 5th Alabama Cavalry, Pickett's 10th Alabama Cavalry, Burtwell's 11th Alabama Cavalry, Moreland's Cavalry Regiment, Stuart's Alabama Cavalry Battalion, Roddey's Escort Company, Capt Jack Sleeth's Scouts and Ferrell's Georgia Battery.

Don't know about Thomas. He's not listed with the family in 1860. Thomas Graves son of Mary and Charles Graves died as a member of Co K, 19th Alabama Regiment. There is a Thomas Graves who received a parole as a member of Co "F", 1st Alabama Cavalry. That would be Capt Musgrove's Company of the old 12th Alabama PR Battn.

For what it's worth, in 1860 Claiborne L Wilhite lived at Gandy's Cove, Morgan County AL.